Reconciling Saints

Does anyone ever click on my post titles? Do you guys know that sometimes I post links up there?

Curious...

It's mostly videos or songs that inspire me or the post.

The more I write the more I feel whole. I don't know what it is since sometimes writing also makes me the most insane because I can't seem to wrangle the words at all. Not to, though, is almost a fate worse than death.

Weird.

I'm still working on the novel that I started on for NaNoWriMo because I want to see what happens to them, I want to know what they do... my characters in that story. I remember rereading part of it one night when I was trying to see where I had left off last and thinking, "Oh my god! They're real! I created them... they're real!" Nutty!

The novel has no title yet and I'm not sure what the charcters are doing aside from the fact that they're just doing and they amuse me. That's why I write. *shrugs*

So this whole "lost" feeling is fading. It comes and goes. Mainly I get it when ... well I don't know, I just know that sometimes the door swings the wrong way and I cannot help it. That's when I see the terrible, that when I feel the worst. I always know that the door will swing back the other way, but in that time, it's all about dealing with which way the door has swung this time.

I don't know how to talk about this without sounding like a lunatic... or like I'm 16... which is the same thing really.

I try not to censor myself on my blog because this is supposed to be a space for me to talk about how I feel and what I don't like and what's making me cream my jeans. So I try to make it so that I don't whine (much), I don't talk about feeling horrible or feeling elated too much. Generally I think I sound 16 when writing about any of the aforementioned... so... I suppose I just have the depth of a 16 year old!

Right...

So I'm sorter back... as in I'm back until something shiny distracts me... So, basically I'm back until Wednesday when I'm in London.